Frosty Nonsense

Its beginnning to look alot like a LONG winter is in the offing. The curtain just lifted on the month of December's performance and already we have subzero windchills. Brr! It is seriously cold here in northeast Iowa, folks. But, I'm determined to fight back by trying to stir up some fun within the frigidity!

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Here we go........a weed decked out in frost crystals. Hilarious, isn't it!! What could possibly be funnier! I knew you'd agree.......

Hold onto your caps! The silos are under attack---or, at least being tickled---by alien tree branches armored in frost. Look out!!



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This next photo shows a Barnyard Picasso.......a painting by the dairy-farmer-wanna-be alter ego of the famous artist, Pablo Picasso. This painting---entitled Your Eye or Mine?---was stolen by a ring of Italian bovine art thieves in the 1920's before it could ever see the light of day. After being smuggled for years from cow herd to cow herd in Europe, in the late 1940's the painting was wrapped carefully and hidden in a bale of hay bound for the U.S. on a ship full of rare
Dutch Belted cows. The hay bale ended up being shipped inadvertantly to a Canadian dairy farm---in southern British Columbia, I believe. A farm hand found the painting some weeks later while feeding the hay bale to a herd of Ayrshire cows.

Shortly after, the farmhand made the mistake of showing the painting to the milk truck driver, who had a gift for telling jokes well, and he proceeded to incapacitate the farmhand with a very funny one---it made the farmhand laugh so hard he couldn't see---which provided the milk truck driver an opportunity to nab the painting and stow it in the rear storage compartment of the truck's tank. The truck driver intended to use the painting to impress a woman he badly wanted to date, who owned a herd of Jersey cows. As luck would have it, though, the milk truck sustained a flat tire before reaching the woman's farm. A mechanic was called out to fix the tire; he spied the painting there in the milk truck's storage compartment and quietly stashed it in between the tools in the back of his tire repair truck, suddenly conjuring a plan to sell it to a wealthy lawyer who moonlighted as the owner of a Guernsey cow herd. The lawyer asked to keep the painting for a few days in order to think the purchase over. In the meantime, one of his cows contracted milk fever and the local veterinarian was called out to treat her. The vet saw the painting in the lawyer's barn office and found a way to unobtrusively snatch it while pretending to need to return to his truck for a syringe and more injectable calcium. The vet, who owned a large herd of
LaMancha dairy goats, hung the painting in his milking parlor, thinking the goats would appreciate the bovine art.......but, no, they did not........because they're not bovines.....duh.....they're caprines! The goats managed to pawn the painting off on an unsuspecting dairy supply route driver, who was next headed to a farm which had a Brown Swiss cow herd. The dairy supply guy had no idea the painting was a Picasso, and he left it leaning against a calf pen where it was found by the farmer's young niece who was visiting from a Milking Shorthorn farm in the famous dairy state of Wisconsin, and she ended up taking it home with her. From there it was hoofed over to an ordinary Holstein cow dairy farm. That gives you a rough idea of how Your Eye or Mine? began its underground circulation amongst dairy farms here in the U.S.A. The painting will be at our farm for awhile, then will be whisked on---when and by whom and to where, I have absolutely no clue. Someone really should muster up the courage to turn it over to the authorities, but I won't do it.......no way will I risk ending up on some shadowy bovine mob hit list, as I'm already on our mob of cows' daily _hit list.
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Speaking of shadows........

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Bet you didn't know I'm one of those leggy gals who men drool over and other women hate. Yup......now you know. (Or, perhaps I'm related to Gumby.)
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Try to have fun with whatever the weather brings your way today!!
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[From this post, can you tell I was stuck in my computer room most of Tuesday afternoon while Husband yabbered with two seed salesmen. Its that time of year......time to look all the way ahead to next spring's planting season. A $9000 seed bill surely helps one get in the mood to go Christmas shopping! And, we are just small-time seed buyers.........think of the farmers who plant hundreds and thousands of acres.......well, not that I feel very sorry for them or anything, but......wow, what gigantic seed bills they must have!

Everything I wanted to get done yesterday afternoon was in the vicinity of the kitchen, where those three yackers were hanging out, so I retreated to the computer room. Over the years, Husband has threatened to put up a sign at the end of the driveway saying: "WE SHOOT EVERY THIRD SALESMAN, AND THE SECOND ONE JUST LEFT!"]
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