Do You Bare Arms?

Here's a link to an article from a recent Waterloo Courier:

“Right To Bare Arms: Michelle Obama’s Toned Biceps Spur Envy, Imitation”.

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The article prompted some thoughts........

Most certainly, Michelle Obama is beautiful and the same can be said for her arms. Never in a million years could my arms ever look as good as hers…..even if I did the weekly limb workouts that Michelle does. How do I know that? Because she possesses something crucial that I don't: WIDE shoulders attached to those lovely arms. See the fabulous green dress Michelle is wearing……look at the way the straps are fashioned……hanging assuredly on capable, wide-set shoulders. That style would never stay put on my narrow, rounded shoulders. No how, no way.

(Photo by Saul Loeb/AFP)

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From my first days of wearing the dreaded undergarment of the female upper torso, there was a constant battle between slipping straps and my sloping shoulders. Front-hook and racerback designs had not yet been discovered back then (male designers were mesmerized by the challenge of the back clasp, for some reason), so there was no recourse but to wear the only style available; it had straps attached in a widely-spaced manner which placed them precariously on either edge of my measly shoulders. Cliffhanger straps, they were. All through junior high and high school, I employed the disappearing hand trick every few minutes, dip-scooping deep inside my collar to retrieve straps which had slipped waywardly down my arm. I rarely saw other girls make similar moves, but it took me years to figure out that my narrowly-built shoulders were to blame. As the years went by, poofy sleeves and shoulder pads were good friends of mine.

In recent years, when I was required to shop for "alluring" MOB* apparel, followed a year later by a search for a "youthful" MOG* frock, my exasperating shoulder shape was definitely a factor, winnowing away many of the dress choices displayed in the stores. (As a side note……I was at a mens’ formal-wear shop recently, accompanying my son who was getting measured for a prom tux. While waiting, I perused a catalog of 2009 wedding dress styles. Guess what! Straps and sleeves are coming back! Like I care, of course……but I can hardly believe it because strapless styles have been all the rage for several years.)

Anyhow, back to Michelle Obama’s gloriously toned arms. I am truly very happy for her and as far as I'm concerned she can show those arms off whenever she wishes. However, fashion designers better not get the inane notion that the rest of us women harbor a burning desire to gad about in a bare-armed state. I go sleeveless here at home in the summertime, for yardwork or fieldwork (Got to get that tan, you know, for vanity’s sake, and I do tan very easily, though its a rather pointless pursuit anymore, really.). How pleasant to feel the warm breeze on bare arms, however…..I can hardly wait for that. Sunshine on the skin is good for lifting moods and prompting our bodies to produce vitamin D, but I wouldn’t be caught dead leaving the farm with bare arms at this point in my life.

When I go out in public, like for shopping or church, I don’t wear any sleeve shorter than a 3/4-length. That’s just about right, as forearms tend to keep their shape fairly well, relatively speaking. Why upper arms can’t just stay shapely on their own, too, I’ll never know. No, they have to get thick on top with muscles and then sport a droopy handle of fat underneath, too. What an attractive combo. My upper arms have always been rather bulky anyway…..my wrists and elbows are large, too, for some strange reason. My arms are extra long, also. A grand mix: narrow, rounded shoulders and long arms. Its hardly any trouble at all for me to be convinced that slumpy, round-shouldered, long-armed apes might inhabit the far distant branches of my family tree. Blouses and button-cuff shirts never fit me right…..the sleeves are too short and the cuffs won’t button. Its an uncomfortable hassle to deal with, so I never wear such shirts or blouses…..ixnay on the ousesblay. And, you know those nifty, stretchy-woven shirts with the 3/4-length sleeves that button just below your elbow......well, I wear them, but with the cuff buttons undone to accomodate my arm's girth. Sigh.

Sigh again. Over the next unknown number of years, I will gaze wistfully at the First Lady's beautiful, photogenic arms, knowing that such are not in the cards (or photos) for me. But, as long as I have arms to utilize, that’s all that matters!

Raise your hand (and, arm, of course) if you agree that Michelle Obama has gorgeous arms!!

Also......here's the article that goes with the photo above.

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[*MOB = Mother of the Bride, *MOG = Mother of the Groom]

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